Reasoning

People keep asking me why I'm on a diet if I'm so unhappy with doing it. To these people I say this. I have been on a diet in one form or another since I was 14.

I've done Slimfast, Weight Watchers, Slimming World, Cleansing diet, Medical Weight Loss, and now The Zone. In between those I've done no carbs, given up bananas, stopped eating sugar, been to a nutritionist etc.

So I think now you could probably understand why I'm a little tired of all of this. I have lost a total of about 35-40 lbs over the course of that time and have yo yo'ed on the scale so much I don't really bother with it anymore.

I'm not loosing weight just for vanity (although I would like to be able to wear a bikini once in my life) I'm doing it for my health. At some point you have to take responsibility for yourself and what it wrong with you. I have PCOS. Because of that I have a higher chance of getting diabetes (Something that scares the crap out of me) and also heart disease and stroke. It can also effect my chances of having a baby later on...So it really is in my best interests to do this.

If that means I have to measure all my food, or am that annoying girl at the restaurant who takes 20 minutes to order her food, who asks for everything on the side, who gets a take out box before the food comes, then that's what I'm going to do.

It's easy to blame your problems on someone else. "I wasn't taught how to eat properly" or "chocolate just tastes too good" or "If I can't have pizza then it's not worth it". But at some point you have to suck it up and realize that however it happened, you had a role in it and I for one am determined to get down to a decent size before it's too late.

So I'm on a diet, but that doesn't mean I'll be happy and on a diet. If you don't want to read about it that's fine, you don't have to, but don't ask me to stop whinging about it because it's my bloody blog and I'm going to go kicking and screaming until I have a tiny little ass that you can bounce a quarter off!