Here, There and Back Again

They say you can never go home again. It's a lie, you can and frequently in my case. I am back home and am officially an Essex Girl in the USA again. I can't really tell you how I feel about this turn of events as I'm not really sure myself.

I think when they say you can't go home they mean you can't go back to the person you were when you left. I wonder, then, if my experience is unique, because I feel exactly the same. I'm sitting on the same couch I sat on  just over a year ago, contemplating the next big adventure in my life. I have to wonder if the great quest novels like Lord of the Rings would have been quite so interesting if Frodo ended up sitting on his couch, puffing smoke and getting drunk with Sam. I doubt it. (and FYI I am neither smoking nor drinking...perhaps this post would be more interesting if I were)

I am of course not comparing a year studying in Newcastle to an epic quest fraught with danger (although the Gate on a Saturday night can get a little scary). I suppose the point is that I'm back where I started. Wasn't Bilbo's book going to be called "There and Back Again"? I never really noticed what a sad phrase that was. Back again, like nothing has even happened. Back to the start like hitting replay on a favourite song. I suppose to be able to return at all is a good thing, but how do you settle back to the life you had before? Surely you are different even if you don't feel that you are.

I won't labour the Lord of the Rings metaphor any more. I don't remember enough about the books to do it justice. Needless to say I feel like I'm on a roundabout, constantly coming up to the same crossroads every few months. What I really need is a swift kick in the ass to tell me to get over myself and get on with it. I'm sure one is forthcoming. I have good friends like that.

And if all else fails and I don't have any more adventures, I'm a writer so I can make some up for myself.